Watch out, new doctor coming through

Today was the first day we hit the wards as fully-fledged doctors. We were supposed to be shadowing the intern who we're taking over from on Monday (the first 'official' day), however due to some staff shortages, some of us had to actually do a fair bit of work. My first job is Cardiology, which consists of three alternating weeks between the cardiology ward, the coronary care unit, and the day procedure unit. Because there are three of us interns covering the three different areas, it is meant to be a somewhat cruisy job.

Having said that, being a real doctor is f#cking scary. Charts get thrust in front of your face, medications need to be written and signed off, and every mistake you make is accountable to you - because you wrote your name on it and signed the stupid piece of paper. Life as a student seemed so much easer - there was no responsibility, you could do all the work yet not actually have any responsibility for any mistakes, and you could leave pretty much whenever you wanted to. Now, if I want to leave, I can't. If I mess up, it's my head on the chopping block. If I see a patient, I'm the real deal. I'm the doctor. It's been very nerve-racking so far. However, its still a massive adrenaline rush to be finally doing what I've trained for six years to be doing. I can't wait till I get used to the place and I can start properly enjoying the work. Here's hoping the fire never dies!